Spit & Eggs 3×09

Don’t fear the raper.

The Greek system is struck down, so the feminists celebrate by singing, “Na-na na na, na-na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye” on a a pig float. Feminists must have lots of time on their hands, because they don’t have boyfriends. However, Mel, a cigar-smoking alumnus who remembers the good times at his fraternity returns and threatens to withhold his donations, so Dean O’Dell brings back the Greeks, to the ire of the feminazis. Upon hearing the news, they egg and harass his car while he’s inside. You’ll regret this, they yell.

Logan thinks with the way things are going between them, there will be a much bigger explosion later than if they broke up now, so he drops da bomb. He adds that if she needs anything, he’ll be there… but she never does need anything. Veronica barely says a word with tears shining in her eyes. And she looked so happy when she greeted him, too. She tells Mac, Wallace, and her father, who all try to make sure she’s okay, but she says she’s fine. Then, home alone with Keith gone on a case, she finally lets out her emotions: she cries in the shower. Why is it, that every time she cries about Logan or feeling very emotional about him (good or bad), she’s in a small, confined area? (i.e., elevator, shower) And yay, she was broken up with for once.

Veronica wrote a perfect murder paper? Whut? What about the internship essay that would take place of the end-of-term paper? She gets an A, like, no doubt, and is called to Timothy Foyle’s office, where she checks out his creepy rape board again, where she notices various Pi Sig members have been circled, including Dick. Turns out he called her in to correct the syntax and grammar of her paper before posting it online. I’d call him a jerk, but he looks like a transsexual fashioning him/herself after Michael Jackson, so I’m being nice. When V asks about his board, he doesn’t reveal any info, because he wants to be the first one to catch him. Tim’s girlfriend, Bonnie, comes in, whom who saw last episode leaving the Pi Sigs frat after sleeping with someone (and Dick, who yelled at her).

O’Dell hires Keith to find out if his wife is a slut. At first, he finds out nothing, which O’Dell is happy to hear about, until Veronica tells Keith about Dr. Landry. He returns with proof of his wife’s infidelity and they drink. A lot. After Keith leaves him, Cyrus O’Dell grabs a handgun from his desk to go to the Neptune Grand, where his wife is having one of her “Junior League meetings” with Landry. He confronts the two of them, but we have no idea what happens… yet? The next scene we see of him is in his office as he wakes up to eggs being hurled at his window.

With the return of the Greeks, the Pi Sigs hold a huge party. Weirdly, the rapist has put out an ad advertisting his future rape in the school newspaper. After visiting Parker at the Take Back the Night table with coasters that can detect GHB and Rohypnol, Veronica plans to attend this party, arming herself, Wallace, Mac and Piz with these coasters. The Pi Sigs have their own system to dissuade any attacks: buying your own cup, writing your name on it with marker, with their own, possibly fake, coasters. Chip don’t care. (I wonder if he really shaved his head.)

As the gang check various drinks, hilarity ensues. Dick, who is hanging with Bonnie, is quickly cleared. Suddenly, Tim marches in and goes off the hook, and not in a good way. He knew of her extracurricular activities, and that every time she was with someone else, so was he. Is Bonnie stupid? She’s cheating on the T.A. for Intro to Criminology? I find it hard to believe Bonnie wasn’t aware that he could solve some mysteries.

As V roams through the party, she sees Logan for the first time since their break-up. They greet each other awkwardly, as Mercer feels the un!comfortable! too. He excuses himself because he has to tend to Club Flush. Wallace and Piz quickly rush in and say they’ve found a drink positive for the date-rape drug. The cup belongs to Kim Kaiser, who lives off-campus. Logan’s car is the closest, so he offers to go. Veronica disagrees at first, but Logan says to let him do “this” part (the dangerous part, I reckon). She tells him to be careful, and Wallace decides to go with him. V uses the mic on the performer’s stage to ask if anyone knows Kim. Later, a girl comes up and admits Kim’s younger sister, Carrie, used her older sister’s ID. Carrie felt sick and walked back to her dorm in Bennis Hall. Club Flush, airing over the speakers, becomes distorted for a second. Veronica puts two and two together. (It makes four!)

Mercer lives in Bennis Hall! His secret gambling dorm! I screamed. After the commercial break, we see Mercer walking into Carrie’s room, questioning her unicorn collection. So do I. If you have a valuable unicorn collection, why not leave it at home, instead of bringing it all to college? That could mean a huge risk for robbery. Mercer gives his evil, moustache-twirling speech to Carrie on the bed, opens the closet door when he hears a creak, only to find Carrie’s unconscious body inside. Veronica tasers him from behind. I just realized, Veronica gets punched in the face a lot. So, she gets punched in the face. She manages a swipe at his face. She ends up on the ground and tries to hide under the bed, but Mercer drags her out. She spots a ceramic unicorn from underneath, though, and stabs him in the leg with it. Girls love unicorns, dad!

Veronica starts running, and for some reason goes to Wallace’s and Piz’s room, where she bangs on their door for help. Uh… they’re at the party where you asked them to test for date-rape drugs (and Wallace is actually with Logan). You would’ve had a better chance knocking on the other doors, as we will see later. She tiredly drops to the floor, when she sees Moe walk up to her. She quickly tells him Mercer is the rapist, as he tries to calm her down with oolong tea in his room. Moe calls campus police, and says he will call a bunch of guys to go to Carrie’s room to make sure she’s okay. When he leaves, she notices a photograph of Mercer and Moe in guard and prisoner garb on his corkboard. Of course!! M&M, man, they’re delicious.

The door is locked, and the tea was laced with GHB, so Veronica thinks about jumping out the window. She tries to call her father, but it goes to voicemail. Through some weird cutting that makes sense since she is drugged, the next second she ends up in his closet, where she finds a hammer and a lot of hair. Moe returns with Mercer in tow, and with the open window, they assume she jumped out, but then the phone rings. They open the closet door, but Veronica isn’t giving up without a fight, as she smashes the hammer on Moe’s toes. As a final resort, she blows on her rape whistle (it came with the coasters). Parker can hear the call, and she’s not even in their dorm. It’s like flashing Batman’s sign into the sky. Mercer leaves to retrieve more GHB to make Veronica forget, but when he returns, sees Parker in the hallway. In other news, Parker was right with the cologne. She asks where “she” is, but he feigns innocence. Doesn’t work when you’re limping, have a bloody leg and nail marks across your face. Parker screams, “Rape!” and a million guys come outside. They must be losers, because there’s a huge party going on guys! It’s at the Pi Sigma frathouse. I’ll give you my number later. One of them questions the whistle sound they heard. Moe comes outside, too. Mercer finally hobbles away. A couple of the dudes, who look like football players, go after him, but they suck (see next paragraph). Moe runs after him, because he doesn’t know what else to do. Parker opens Moe’s door and sees Veronica lying on the floor.

Veronica used Moe’s cellphone to call her father, so he’s able to track the pair to a motel room, where Moe is obediently pulling out the unicorn horn from Mercer’s thigh. Waiting until after what I imagine could be a good replacement for Mercer’s orgasm scene, Keith kicks in the door. At the Mars apartment, Veronica explains to Wallace, Mac, and Piz that Moe was the setup guy, who called Mercer with the room info. She also thinks Moe attacked her to give Mercer an alibi (who was in jail… d’oh!). When Mac asks if Logan’s been by yet, she replies he hasn’t. Then we cut to what is the most hilarious thing ever (to me): as two deputies relax in a diner, in the background, Logan walks to their cruiser with a baseball bat and starts smashing the glass. The way it was filmed was pure comedy, but it would’ve been nicer if it had been a tire iron. This lands him in the same jail cell as Mercer and Moe, whereupon seeing them, Logan flexes his knuckles.

We see Weevil have a friendly relationship with Dean O’Dell as he fixes his television early in the episode. In the end, he enters his office to install a receiver, as promised. Except Dean O’Dell was shot in the head.

This may have been the most satisfying conclusion to any of their long-running mysteries, but there were still little holes for me.

(1) Moe was initially cleared, but that was understandable. Mercer was “cleared” of the summer rape because he was in Mexico. But then… how did he rape her?? Was that another of Lilith House’s fake rapes? And if he used a recording for all the dates of the rapes, why didn’t anyone know he wasn’t there? Was he that quick? All the radio station scenes we saw seemed to show it wasn’t no-man’s land, occupied only by the DJ.
(2) Why wasn’t there forensic evidence? Mercer pretty much traipsed in there in his normal clothes and didn’t have anything that would stop any of his body cells from transferring. Did Moe leave it there? Argh, that setup guy, Moe!
(3) Wait, so not only is Mercer the rapist, but he runs an illegal gambling hall, takes bets for sporting events, AND places half-eaten pizza slices on top of his books? PURE EVIL.

I am glad, I was twothirds right. I finally guessed whodunit (mostly) correctly, instead of being spoiled for the culprit. (This was an accident, though, because I fell behind in reading this message board, then I fell sick and it pushed it back even more.)

I think Timothy Foyle killed Dean O’Dell, because I’m theorizing he may have fired Landry or something to that effect during their confrontation. We know Foyle is very fond of Landry, we just saw he was prone to explosive anger, and only last episode we were told by Hallie (truthfully or not) that Bud Rose’s assistant was obsessed with Bud to a Swimfan-ian degree, so I’m guessing Foyle, in his Swimfan-ian love, seeked revenge for his faire professor. But did he get the news that quickly? He did scream, “I KNOW EVERYTHING!” I don’t think the feminists did it, because they never seem to carry out their threats, except with eggs and fake rapes. (How many times have they said, “You’ll regret this,” etc., to someone [Veronica], and then nothing really happens?) I don’t believe O’Dell shot anyone, because if this is going to be like the movie Bubble (like Rob Thomas says), there’s only going to be one murder. I don’t think he committed suicide, either, because someone mysterious came in in the last scene that we saw he was alive! If all the clues have already been laid out for us to figure out, I think it was Foyle.

So long, Ed Begley, Jr.! He was painted as a bit of a jerk at first, but they really developed his character to make him sympathetic so viewers would feel sad about his death in nine episodes. Good show, mate. Oh well, I can still see him hairless in Arrested Development and sing popular Swedish folk songs in A Mighty Wind.

When Veronica’s VO said a rapist was still at large, Ryan Devlin’s name appeared on screen in the guest star credits. (He played Mercer.) Accidental or not, that was pretty cool.

I’m… not exactly sure what much we have to discuss about Logan and Veronica’s relationship. So they broke up? It was sort of obvious that would happen. Oh, well. I should stop reading spoilers. (Hey, I only said I had stopped visiting a message board for spoilers.)

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