Look Who’s Stalking 2×20

I have never, ever, ever had a problem with pre-emptions. Okay, they kinda irk me, but I understand their purpose. BUT HOW CAN YOU PRE-EMPT FOUR CONSECUTIVE EPISODES, WITH THE LATTER THREE NOT EVEN AIRING UNTIL FIVE DAYS LATER???? Worst. Affiliate. Ever. Airing it twice in one night doesn’t make things better. The local affiliate is owned by Fox, ugh. I like the Fox network the most because it’s like the crazy cousin you like to have fun with, and you totally get him. But once he starts sticking his fingers in too many pies, he becomes a douche. Yeah, that analogy’ll work.

Yes, the Tom Cruise joke was genius. (Once, teenage girls dreamed of marrying Tom Cruise. Now, they live in fear of it.)
EW TV Watch

I love you, EW.

The calm before the storm: Gia’s being stalked, Woody’s involved in a scandal, Terrence is exposed, and Veronica is shocked by VD. Yup. Real calm.

Veronica has chlamydia. I hoped it was a foiler, or part of an investigation, but when the episode summary stated she receives “stunning news,” I thought “… No. But maybe it’s all part of an investigation! They can’t reveal that plotline in the UPN summary!” Nope. She has chlamydia. I hope it will lead to something bigger, because just giving her an STD is so arbitrary. I don’t mean it’s unrealistic, but so few instances on the show are throwaways (spy pen, anyone? Though the backstory was only dropped due to lack of time), that I believe it just has to go somewhere else other than being a PSA. Well, at least it’s not herpes.

Duncan’s down in Mexico, so she asks Logan about his best friend’s sexual history. (Yeah, this is probably worse than last week’s sex question.) He only knows of Meg and Veronica. Then he hands her an invitation to Alterna-Prom, since the school prom was cancelled due to alcohol violations on the senior trip (how was Magic Mountain, BTW?). Aww, they’re flirting. Later, as Veronica is helping with her dad stuff envelopes with a police sketch of the man who hired the hooker who stole Cliff’s briefcase (that is a mouthful), Logan remarks he looks like his dad’s cellmate. Oh, boy. Aaron, you’ve got your fingers in a lot of pies.

Gia Goodman asks for help when she notices a nondescript car following her around. (Then… how did she notice it?) Veronica tells her to swing by her pad; the remote cameras she installed on the roof spot the vehicle. While she updates her Netflix queue, she runs the license plate number, which belongs to the Greek(!)-Italian former deputy, Leonardo D’Amato. She invites him out for coffee under the ruse of catching up, but suddenly Gia pops up and asks why he’s all, like, stalkery. Leo’s entered private security after his less than graceful fall from the sheriff’s department; he and Earl were hired by her father, Woody, as an election precaution. Leonardo’s disappointed that Veronica only asked him out for this info. BURN! (Gia calls him mumbly. DOUBLE BURN!)

Woody agrees to pull off Earl and Leo, but then Gia finds a DVD of herself cheering at one of Rodney’s soccer games. It seems the video is “checking her out” in that lecherous, up-and-down her body way. As Veronica examines the footage, she notices a woman (Mrs. Harmon) directly opposite the cameraman recording the game; Gia gives an excuse to the woman to get a copy. In her video, the guy is wearing a Neptune High letterman jacket, and leaves in a red pickup truck. She can’t find it in the school parking lot, though.

Kendall drops by Mars Investigations and wants her hard drive back.

Meanwhile, Woody calls up Keith for help: it seemed he was ready to get it on with some campaign staffer, who passed out in a room at the Camelot motel. Keith carries her out and discreetly brings her to the hospital, but the next day, complete with photos, the paper announces that Mr. Mars, investigating a campaign leak for Mr. Goodman, plied the young female with alcohol for information, but Mr. Goodman stopped him. Keith, naturally, is hella pissed. Lloyd Blankenship of the Neptune Register interviews Keith for his side of the story; the latter states if they find the woman, she can corroborate the TRUF! Lloyd explains Woody more or less blamed Keith, and the woman mysteriously disappeared. Together, they publish another scandalous piece blaming another famous guy (the first was the Lilly Kane murder story).

Now Gia is hella pissed Veronica’s dad would say that about her father, but V continues to try to help. She shows Keith the DVD, but he tells her to drop the case because he thinks it ties in with the DVD recording of the Goodman home, which he shows her. He knows there’s something not kosher about Woody’s explanation that it was a disgruntled gardener who decided to tape them, who then dropped the issue faster than a hot potato.

On school newspaper deadline night, Veronica tries to speak with Gia again, but she is still adamant at ignoring her. V finally decides to leave, responding to the night janitor Lucky’s “hello, Veronica.” (So what, they are all buddy-buddy and know each other now?) Outside, she sees a red pickup… parked in the maintenance spot. Veronica calls her father and runs back into the school to save Gia with only a taser. Inside, Lucky has somehow lured Gia into his secret lair (with something shiny, probably) and shows off his abdomen scar; he sounds freakier and more spastic than the take-charge dude we saw in Logan’s flashback. Veronica quietly informs Gia that Lucky is the stalker and they try to slink outta there. Unfortunately, our night janitor pulls out a gigantic machete he starts twirling around. Keith leaps in at the nick of time; Lucky shouts that Woody deserved it. Sheriff Lamb also decides to join the fun, but Keith cuffs himself to Lucky and throws the key down the drain. They both share a cell as the sheriff department tries to find the appropriate key. (Ha, so he has a custom pair of handcuffs?) It takes (what appears to be) a couple hours, but Keith gets Lucky to spill what he knows about Woody before he’s unceremoniously interrupted by Lamb. Twice. Lucky’s out on bail… thanks to Mr. Manning, Meg’s father. Say what, now? (Even Lamb looks a little nonplussed, who was not a total fuckface in this episode.)

The Wallace and Jackie scenes are just buildup to the sex. Yawn. Which was a little icky and weird, by the way; it was like watching your good friend do the deed, and most people aren’t really into that. Jackie’s happy her father’s incapacitated by the bullet wound, because it means a lot of daddy-daughter time. Terrence admits to Keith Ms. Dumass was planning a tell-all detailing his gambling debts and how he threw a playoff game to pay it, which is why he broke into her parents’ place. Doesn’t matter anyway, because someone leaks the story to the public. Jackie, the dutiful daughter, throws this piece of news away before reading him the other headlines.

Incorporation, which we’ve been hearing about almost the whole season, fizzles out with an anticlimactic “no.” (1) Did Goody purposefully orchestrate the passed-out woman scenario, knowing this would push it ever so slightly to rejection? (2) Was there ever a chance that incorporation could pass, if there were no scandals? (3) Is Goodman being controlled by someone else? I found his performance at the motel, when pleading to Keith for help, very insincere, which is why I think it was planned. Also, the woman just vanishes off the face of the hospital? Something’s foul afoot, I tells ya.

At the Alterna-Prom, people dance and get drunk. Mac is dancing at arms’ length with Butters, who confesses he wanted to go to prom with her because he thought she’d understand him since they are both weird, in a nice way. Mac softens a bit. Dick tries to hit on every girl, including Madison and Veronica. Wallace and Jackie are canoodling before getting a room to rock the casbah, leaving V alone. Logan finds her and he drunkenly admits that their relationship is “epic” and he apologizes for vandalizing the community and lighting pools on fire last summer. Senior year’s almost over, and they won’t see each other again, he says, before leaning in to kiss her. Veronica almost reciprocates until she tells him she has to leave and hops off the chair. Logan feels rejected.

Early next morning, Veronica leaves her apartment to go to the penthouse. After some hesitation, she knocks on Logan’s door. She starts apologizing for running off last night and won’t let Logan interrupt her. She reveals she doesn’t want him out of her life either, and that after graduation, they should make it a point to see each other and see where it goes from there. After a really long awkward pause, Veronica realizes he doesn’t remember what happened last night. He confirms that it was a “blur,” and then Kendall’s moony face pops up behind Logan, her tentacles trailing his young flesh. She’s disappointed it’s not room service, then retreats to the bowels of hell. Logan tries to explain about last night, but Veronica won’t have any of it. She gives him hardened “stop” as she walks away. However, when she gets on the elevator, she turns around to face him. The sliding doors close on her tearful face.

OMG, he made her cry! The last time she cried, he had the gun at River Stix!! “Epic” has become the new “WE WERE ON A BREAK!” for me.

After this emotional scene, I felt a lump in my throat, yearning to be free yet at the same time praising their amazing performances. I was so affected and the lump bothered me so much, I had to scream after Rob Thomas’s executive producer credit faded. I killed a nearby puppy, and ruined my neighbor’s hearing forever (that bitch), but it was worth it. AAAHHHHHHHH!!!

Something HAS to happen with them in the next two episodes, or the spoilers where one makes breakfast for the other, and they talk seriously about something totally don’t make sense… unless they are foilers. Well, they haven’t been debunked yet, and I’ve only heard one foiler so far in the whole two seasons, so… SOMETHING GOOD BETWEEN THEM HAS TO HAPPEN!!

I normally don’t like posting VM photos, because like Pringles once I start I can’t stop, but I will allow one exception just this once. Okay, twice. …Thrice?


“Oh, shit.”

Utter heartbreak.


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